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Thursday, December 10, 2009

Let's Party!!


It's that time of the year again - time to party courtesy of my Company! Tomorrow night my lovely work colleague Mr. D & the delightful Mrs. D, along with myself & MOTH, will hit the town to wind up a very big year at work. Mr. D & I have had more than our fair share of big nights over the years to celebrate surviving another year & despite my lower limb limitations, this year will be no exception! We are supposed to have one of the Senior Management team fly down from Sydney to join us, but strangely each year, our State knees-up always seems to fall on the same night as the Head Office shindig, so sadly, they can't make it. Takes some very 'creative' co-ordination on our part that does!!!

I love these little gems for Office Christmas Party Etiquette - not that we'll need to brush up ourselves, we'll all be perfect Angels. Enjoy a monstrous weekend everyone!

Office Christmas Party Etiquette

Christmas parties are a cultural tradition within companies and businesses.
They are supposed to be fun, frivolous, flirty, but not filthy.
We advise you to exercise great care and restraint so that your most embarrassing drunken occasion doesn't occur at the company Christmas Party.
Workers should avoid getting drunk, sleeping with workmates, crying, throwing up or chatting to superiors at the office Christmas party.

What To Wear
  • Men - Make sure you're comfortable, there's a good chance you'll eat and drink a lot, and you don't want to split your pants.
  • Ladies - Unless you're in the porn industry, a lot of skin is inappropriate at company Christmas parties. Ensure you're going to be warm enough, you don't want your lips turning blue and your nipples behaving like headlights. Bras should always be worn to parties, they tend to make the woman look more attractive.

How Much To Eat And Drink

  • Wobbly legged is definitely not an option at the company Christmas party. Have a look at R U Pissed to see how much you might be able to drink.
  • Sometimes, a little bit of alcohol and good food while sitting beside your office heart throb will get your pulses racing. If you feel things might get heated, find accommodation.

Meet & Mingle

  • If you see the IT manager sitting on his own in a dark corner, help him out and go speak to him. The poor guy has problems fitting in.
  • Stay away from the mistletoe! You will most likely pucker up with just about the ugliest person in the office.
  • Don’t sing or show off your dance moves no matter how drunk you are.

How To Score At The Christmas Party

  • If you are going to fish from the office pool that there will be consequences.
  • Be advised that any reputation may actually help you.
  • The more of a reputation that you have as a, um, good date, the more likely you will be sought out early, and by less desperate types.
  • Stay away from married colleagues. Try to keep to the singles, they are not only safer, but the next-day consequences are limited in comparison.
  • Try to feel out the crowd, and try to pick a target as soon as possible but don’t target more than one person at a time.

Know When Your Night Is Over

  • Trust your instincts on this one. Better to jump in that cab & head home, than to disgrace yourself by suggesting everyone go on to a strip club and then you fall asleep in a toilet cubicle.
  • You see these people nearly every day so be conscious of your actions. Keep your head held high and if you can remember even one of these tips on the night, you'll wake up the next morning with a smile on your face, instead of with that minger from Accounts.
    Image: Daily Mail

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